As searched on Google:
VICTIM: a person harmed, injured, or killed as a result of a crime, accident, or other event or action.
VICTIMIZED: to make a victim of.
VICTIM MENTALITY: Victim mentality is an acquired personality trait in which a person tends to recognize themselves as a victim of the negative actions of others, and to behave as if this were the case in the face of contrary evidence of such circumstances. Victim mentality depends on clear thought processes and attribution.
I have been shown in many ways victim mentality. DO NOT feel bad if this is you or something you have gone through.
We have all had situations, events, discussions, or people that have victimized us.
Whether this is a thought, behavior, feeling or pattern EVERY time we are victimized, we lose something. We lose a part of our self-love, our confidence, our mentality, our strength, our abilities, etc. We lose a part of our POWER.
Do you see this? Do you understand this? This is powerful shit right here!!! I am vibrating from the level of knowledge in that sentence.
EVERY TIME WE ARE VICTIMIZED, WE LOSE SOMETHING!!!
In every case we are a victim! We have suffered an injustice, we have been victimized. Does this define us? NO!!! Does it change who we are? YES!!! When we lose something, it changes us. It causes us to feel, act or look at things a different way.
In the moment of this victimization we are absolutely a victim. But, once the victimization is over are we still a victim? NO!!! ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!
When we are being victimized, we don’t have a choice in that moment. We didn’t choose for the person, company, etc. to victimize us. We didn’t know it was going to happen, we didn’t give them permission. But…once the act, word or injustice is over are we still a victim? NO!!! ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!
We do not remain a victim. We choose to believe that we remain a victim with our victim mentality.
Side Note: If you are a child, person of disability or someone or something that cannot change your circumstances due to a lack of knowledge or ability then you remain a victim every time the injustice occurs.
CAUTION EXTREME EXAMPLE:
I was sexually victimized as a child. I grow up and swear that I will never victimize my children in the same way. I don’t…yay!!! I have broken the cycle of sexual abuse. BUT…I never show my children any form of affection. No loving hugs, kisses or snuggles when they need them. What have I just done? I have lived in a victim mentality. I have also now victimized my own children because we both know they will grow up thinking I do not love them because I didn’t show them any affection.
We allow ourselves to remain in a victim mentality when:
We do nothing to stop ourselves from being victimized repeatedly.
We turn our victim status onto others.
We constantly live in fear, shame, denial, self-doubt, hatred, negativity.
Individuals who are living with a victim mentality may often times believe that every word, action or behavior that is shown by another is an offense to them. Quite often you can tell when someone is living in a victim mentality when they will feed accusations of negative conduct or behaviors even when there may be none.
WE ARE NOT WRONG OR BAD if we remain in a victim scenario or victim mentality. We have allowed ourselves to be controlled by our fears, emotions, or other people and circumstances.
This is what we have been taught, this is what we do not understand.
In order to remove the victim mentality and start living our lives again we must Reclaim Our Power.
We must understand the lesson in the negativity, although it may be hard to see there is always a lesson, even if it is just to learn our own strength!
Learn from the negativity, what does it teach you about your own strength, self-love and even your goals?
Heal the mindset wounds the victimization left behind by learning and embracing who we are now!
Create a path towards a better, brighter future, possibly in helping others learn and grow from their own victimization and struggle.
You can remove your status of victim and replace it with that of a survivor filled with self-love and power.
Much Love
Melissa